Showing posts sorted by relevance for query Santa'S Beard. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query Santa'S Beard. Sort by date Show all posts

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Santa'S Beard - Lyrics - Beach Boys

Title: Santa'S Beard
Artist: Beach Boys
Composer(s): Brian Wilson, Mike Love

Lyric:
I wanna meet Santa Claus, the real real Santa
I wanna meet Santa Claus, the real real Santa
I wanna see Santa Claus, the real real Santa
He wants to meet ol' Santa Claus

I took my brother to the department store
He wanted to show Santa his Christmas list
He stood in line and he shook like a leaf
He's only five and a half goin' on six

He said, "Is that really Santa Claus, really really Santa Claus?
(That Santa)
(The real Santa)
Is that really Santa Claus, really really Santa?
(That Santa)
(I hope he doesn't pull Santa's beard)
Is that really Santa Claus, really really Santa?"
(That Santa)
(The real Santa)
Hope he thinks that's Santa Claus

I picked him up and put him on Santa's lap
And then he pulled the pillow out of his shirt
He yanked the beard right on off of his chin
And in his eyes I could see he was hurt

He said, "You're not really Santa Claus, you're really not Santa Claus
(Not Santa)
(The real Santa)
You're not really Santa Claus, you're really not Santa
(Not Santa)
(He shouldn'ta pulled Santa's beard)
You're not Santa Claus, you're really not Santa"
(Not Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus

He's just helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus

He's just helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(He shouldn'ta pulled Santa's beard)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus, the real real Santa
(Helpin' Santa)
(The real Santa)
He's just helpin' Santa Claus

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53024f8925e4630f23dc0b640d7aa5ab

Christmas In Hollywood - Lyrics - Hollywood Undead

Title: Christmas In Hollywood
Artist: Hollywood Undead
Composer(s): Johnny 3 Tears, Da Kurlzz Deuce Funny Man J-Dog Charlie Scene

Lyric:
It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

Ho, ho, ho, merry Christmas

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

Just a little story about last Christmas
About some bad kids who were full of wishes
We gave some gifts and we gave some lovin'
The weird kind of love that you give to your cousin'

Little Timmy stole from 7-11
So we stopped by his house with a pair of sevens
We drank in his room with some dude named Kevin
But there was still some bad kids who deserved some presents

Zack got caught with a bottle of Jack
So we slipped down his chimney with an 18 pack
He didn't leave cookies but we needed a snack
So we took the beer back and I fucked him in the ass

It's Charlie Scene, got eggnog in my flask
The holidays are back and all my presents are wrapped
Like, oh, my God, is that Saint Nick?
Kids give me your list like it's the 25th

Been accused of being a bad kid
But I get presents as is
Mrs. Clause just Myspace'd me
I blew off a date on Christmas eve

So I don't give a fuck if your naughty or nice
You might still get a Rolly and a gang of ice
So write your list and never have no fear
Have a Hollywood Christmas and an undead new year
Fuck you

Now watch the language, ho, ho, ho

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

I'm 'bout to serve it up for for all you boys and girls
Good kids, bad and even Da Kurlzz
We were chilling at home and decking the halls
So I checked my phone and Santa had called

He said he'd swing by at a quarter to twelve
He said that his jolly ass needed some help
He said Christmas ain't a gang but a way of life
If you guide my sleigh, I'll let you fuck my wife

So we jumped in his sleigh and it started to jingle
Funnier than fuck you can ask Chris Kringle
So we all took flight but something was fishy
He asked for road ahead and started to kiss me

Underneath his suit was just a bunch of pillows
Instead of bags of presents, he had bags of dildo's
I pulled down his beard and it was a monster
It wasn't Saint Nick, it was a fucking imposter

When we found out he started to pout
I took my bandanna and I choked him out
I pulled off his beard and I fucked his mouth
Hijacked his sleigh and headed down south

I had a lot of wild nights but tonight was the craziest
Met a lot of Jeff's but this one was shadiest
When it comes to cheer that motherfuckers a Grinch
So if you don't like Christmas, fuck you, bitch

You kids are in big trouble, oh, boy, ho, ho

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk
Let's get drunk

Let's get drunk, let's get drunk
Let's get drunk, let's get drunk
Let's get drunk

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk
Let's get drunk

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

It's Christmas in Hollywood
Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood
The dradles spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

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Sunday, August 15, 2010

Santa'S A Fat Bitch - Lyrics - Insane Clown Posse

Title: Santa'S A Fat Bitch
Artist: Insane Clown Posse
Composer(s): Mike Clark, Joseph Bruce

Lyric:
Slay bells jingle-lin', ring jin' jingle-lin'
Horses, horses, horses, horses
Slay bells jingle-lin' ring jin' jingle-lin'

Santa Claus suck my balls drunk as hell
Ringin' bells at the malls Dancer Prancer
Nixon and Cupid
I'ma get stupid, ha ha ha

Eh, I sat around all night under the chimney
Holdin' my sack like gimme gimme
I know that he's comin', he's comin'
He must lookin' up nothin' but rust, dust

Turn on my TV the very next day
I see your gettin' paid leadin the parade
I'm that sniper on the buildin'
Listen to my nine go click
Santa's a fat bitch

Santa Claus is a fat bitch
(Santa Claus is a fat, fat, fat bitch)
Another year and I ain't get shit
(Another year I ain't get shit)
If I hear him land on my roof
(Ohh, my undertaker)
I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth

Yeah, I got somethin' to say about St.Nick
Fuck that hoe he never brought jack shit
No toys, candy canes, just a lump of coal
So I eat it, 'cuz there ain't nuttin' in the cupboard

So I'll be quick, quick and brief
All I need for Christmas is my two front teeth
I got my teeth, kicked out my mouth
I need a few numbers could you help me out

Should of known I guessed I'd show not a steak
No kinda gift I didn't get shit
Some say I was bad
But that wasn't it it's all because
Santa's a fat bitch

Santa Claus is a fat bitch
(Santa fuck you 'cuz your a hoe)
Another year and I ain't got shit
(Another year I ain't get shit)
If I hear him land on my roof
(Let's just get his autograph)
I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth

"Oh-ho-ho don't go that way
Rudolf that's the ghetto ho-ho those
Boys and girls don't deserve anything"

Santa Claus, Santa Claus where you been?
I see you got cookies and milk on your chin
I guess you had time to collect your ends
You always been down for your rich friends

But Rudolf, he don't bring' his slay my way
Nothin' but dirt and coal for little J
I guess you couldn't fit down my chimney shaft
You need to loose some of that fat ass, eh

All the little rich bays they gettin' paid
Countin' the toys and ducats they made
Me? I got a little half little chunk of dog shit
I'm a kill that fat bitch

Santa Claus is a fat bitch
(He ate too much McDonald's)
Another year and I ain't get shit
(Mrs.Claus is a hoe)
If I hear him land on my roof
(Slice that bitch in the big red coat)
I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth

For the neighborhood
Christmas and everything's whack
Not a creature stirrin' but a fuckin' rat
I ain't hearin' jingle bells I ain't hearin' nuttin'
Aint smellin' no turkey sure as hell ain't no stuffin'

All that I paid wished and prayed
That fat mutha fucka would swin' my way
Drop off soldiers and rubber balls
But I woke up and found some crusty old drawers

Just as I knew it shaft again and again
And again and again
Every year I wake up to the same old shit
House there be no sign of the fat bitch

Santa Claus is a fat bitch
(Santa Claus is a fat bitch)
Another year and I ain't get shit
(Another year I ain't get shit)
If I hear him land on my roof
(If I hear him land on my roof)
I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth

Santa Claus is a fat bitch
(Santa Claus is a fat bitch)
Another year and I ain't get shit
(I ain't ge-et shi-it)
If I hear him land on my roof
(Ro-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoof)
I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth

"He's got a fuzzy whit beard and a great big smile
A bright red hat you can see for a mile
A bag full of goodies and a great big grin
Hear comes Santa Claus again"

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a8f8d2bf34a5149c9eb7c260bd45f82a

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Christmas Crush - Lyrics - Home Grown

Title: Christmas Crush
Artist: Home Grown
Composer(s): Adam Tyler Lohrbach

Lyric:
Had a crush on Santa
Since I was 9 years old
But oh Santa
Why do you go?

Once a year you come visit me
Eat my cookies, leave presents the same old routine
But now Santa I want something more
No presents all that this girl's askin' for

Santa sleep with me tonight
I read these words in her diary
An invasion of my girlfriend's privacy
I shouldn't have but I'm glad I did

Wonder what does she see in him
A big old tub of jelly
With a double chin
He's older than my grandmother

Indeed this fetish is really bizarre
Sexual attraction for this holiday star
I gotta plan that you wouldn't believe
But I've gotta act like it's Christmas eve

Santa's suit is what I will get
And give my girlfriend a night
That she'll never forget
And neither will I

Went through my closet and found a red robe
Made a beard out of cotton
Stuffed my shirt with pillows
And drove to my girl's house

I slipped down the chimney and to my dismay
Saw Santa and my girl in red lingerie
And in between all the moans and groans
I heard her say oh Santa, oh Santa

She said Santa I miss you, I love you
I wish you would stay home forever with me
Santa I knew you were coming to town
But tonight you are coming in me

Santa, get off of my girlfriend
Get off of my girlfriend

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